Welcome to Graduate THIS! – a survival guide for life after college. We will focus here on helping you achieve a balanced, fulfilling and meaningful life as you transition to the “real world,” get a job, start paying off your debts, get your own place to live, and also as you become an independently functioning human being.
I will start with a quote from the Book of Lamentations: “It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young.” You may not know it now, but you will surely bear the yoke – really a whole set of yokes – that of your boss, that of your parents, your GF/BF (then wife/husband), your friends and classmates, your creditors, and of course, the yoke of your own expectations.
Are you ready for all that? Don’t fool yourself – none but a select few of us are truly ready for this straight from college, never mind at 30. 30’s a big number. I would know.
A short note about myself and why precisely I’m doing this. Name’s Yuri. Born in Russia, raised in Kentucky, college at Penn. Here’s where the story gets interesting. Came to New York in 2004 to do a Ph.D in Neuroscience. Dropped out in 2005, worked for a year, went to law school at Cardozo. Graduated with a mortgage-worth of debt in 2009. Ended up working in finance. Wrote a novel. Worked on a start-up in healthcare. Returned to finance. Married a wonderful French woman. WHEW!
…And in between, made EVERY.SINGLE.MISTAKE.IN.THE.BOOK. Racked up insane credit card debt and absolutely soul-crushing loans. Went to law school (more on that later – don’t be so stupid). Lived beyond my means in the most expensive city in the US. Buried my head in the sand until shit exploded, big time. Took jobs that were truly not for me and crashed out (got fired). Failed to do due diligence/research on employers, lenders, interest rates, acquaintances, etc. Was too impressionable and naive. Over-committed to friendships and relationships. Chased novelty in every NY encounter and hole in the wall. Worked for a slew of asshole bosses. Wasted awful amounts of time in frustration over things I couldn’t control.
Failed to ask for help. Was never taught how to ask. Felt entitled. Had a martyr’s complex. Was an arrogant fool.
In so many words, I was young and immature for most of my 20s. Then, shit got real. I met my wife. G-d bless her, she made me see the extent of the mess I’d made with my life and still stayed with me and helped me through the clean-up and to get to where I am today. We have a saying in Russian, “If you want to be the General’s wife, you have to marry the lieutenant.” Yes, Russian humor. Get used to it 😉
You get the picture. Because I’ve had the great honor and privilege to go through so many mistakes and life-changing events in my 20s, I want to help others learn from my mistakes and to arrive at maturity and functional adulthood much sooner and with much less pain than I did.
Please join me on my journey to learn how to:
Achieve balance and success in the critical areas of your life:
1) your home
2) your mind
3) your relationships
4) your work
5) your finances and
6) your health.
Now, we all know Rome wasn’t built in a day. All this will take hard work, tremendous motivation and one hell of an optimistic mindset. Intelligence helps and humility, even more.
My mission is to help you create a framework to address each of the areas above effectively, to give you the tools to succeed in your goals and to help make your progress sustainable.
Follow my lead.
Thanks for reading.